


Sit Down

by pedanticsoothsayer



Category: Mass Effect Trilogy
Genre: Gen, Implied/Referenced Sexual Harassment
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-09
Updated: 2018-09-09
Packaged: 2019-07-10 02:06:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 570
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15939548
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pedanticsoothsayer/pseuds/pedanticsoothsayer
Summary: Shepard and Joker need to have a little chat.





	Sit Down

**Author's Note:**

> I've tried to write this every single time I play ME3 but actually finally did it. Don't get me wrong, I like Joker but there's a lot he needs to hear.

“Hey Commander. You wanted to talk?”

 

Joker was waiting for her on the Presidium like she had asked. The little Earth-style cafe was out of the way, but was a quiet place to meet privately without being interrupted. He’d picked a table on the balcony, looking over the artificial lake. On any other day, she might have come here to have some time to herself. Just close her eyes for a few moments and pretend everything was normal. For now, she had a war to win and ship to run. Neither was going to happen if she couldn’t maintain order.

 

Shepard set their drinks down on the table and sat down across from her pilot. It was a peace-offering of sorts. He just didn’t know that yet.

 

“Thanks for meeting me,” she said as he began to stir her coffee. “I thought it would be better if we did this without the crew around.”

 

“You’re not exactly my type.”

 

Joker smirked but the corners of Shepard’s mouth twitched. This was going to be more difficult than she thought, but she’d known Jeff for years and respected him too much to let him off the hook.

 

“The way you talk to EDI isn’t appropriate,” she said, cutting right to the chase.

  
He blinked, confused.

 

“You talk about her body like it’s a thing for your viewing pleasure. You make her uncomfortable and you’re either too thick to notice or too much of an ass to care.”

 

“Wait a minute.” He crossed his arms. “That’s what this is about?”

 

“Yeah,” Shepard said curtly. “And ‘that’ is going to stop. You’re both part of my crew and I’m putting my foot down.”

 

“Did she like complain to you or something? Because this feels like it’s coming out of nowhere.”

 

“With the that comes out of your mouth, she doesn’t have to. Even if she did, she’s asked you herself to stop. You just don’t listen.”

 

“Hold on. What about Kenneth?” he said, deflecting. “He’s the one who needs to hear this. The guy can’t go five minutes without saying something skeevy.”

  
“And you bet your ass I’m talking to him next. I just figured you’d prefer to have this conversation somewhere she can’t hear us.”

 

“I just don’t get why we’re having it at all,” he protested.

 

“I don’t tolerate this crap on my ship.”

 

Joker scoffed indignantly. “Your ship? The only reason you’re in charge is because Anderson pulled some strings and stayed behind to fight the real fight.”

 

He was trying to rile her up and it was working. If it wouldn’t have put him in the hospital and been incredible unprofessional, she probably would have punched him for that. Instead, she took a deep breath. She stood, placing her hands on the table and staring him directly in the eyes.

 

“You’re better than this. The moment she uploaded herself into that body you stopped treating her like a person. So you’re going to get your act together and behave like you’ve earned the respect she has for you. Why? Because you’re important to her. And because it’s the twenty-second goddamn century and sexual harassment isn’t a joke.”

 

Something must have gotten through because he nodded weakly. “Yeah. Sure. I’ll apologize or something. Ma’am.”

 

He was still trying to get under her skin, but she wasn’t here to make friends.

 

“Good,” Shepard grabbed her coffee and turned to walk away. “Dismissed.”


End file.
